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  Jupiter Over The Moon. As she had already lost the cognition and level of comprehension she would have needed to make the event a meaningful for her, my dear mother. I could end at this point, the point where I am no longer able to hold court, to spend time in the physical presence of my dear mother. As she is now no longer among us who continue to breathe autonomously.  But, in truth, the journey still has some way to go, because she is yet to be buried.  Though that must await the processing of the due protocols and laws of the country which has been her home for the past two decades.  There is also the early stages of the varied emotional and psychological journey which we must travel to be able to accommodate and/or assimilate.   Before we can be sufficiently healed, following the passing of a loved one. York, UK. These practicalities which must, of necessity, be dealt with, have to be attended to before the families and friends who will be mourning and grieving for the lost of m

  Tenby, Wales/ The place where some people say eternal peace is to be found, and others say ones existence as a conscious being is obliterated and ceases to exist.  The place where still others, such as those who believe in 'life after death', those who believe that the dead is warehoused in a state of suspension and await the 'Day of Judgement', alluded to. Yes, if I were to think too much and too deeply of it, would not I soul becomes more saddened and my mind, my reflective thoughts become more conflicted?  As I reflect on how my dear mother did, seemingly, had to experience some, probably too much mental and physical anguish before she could pass on to that place where pain and consciousness have been banished?   As I recall the day my dear mother expired, as she was held by her hands, by my son and I, in our attempt to comfort her in her final 15-30 minutes of life.  As she laid on her back, with her head leant towards her grandson, and eyes somewhat partly closed

  And now she is back living in her apartment, even though it be at the cost of me having to spend continuous nights with her.  With me, as it were, having to make most of the hands-on family's contribution towards the care package.  Which is probably as should have been expected. As it was I who had argued for my mother's return to her own apartment.   When others might, would, even if reluctantly, have gone ahead with her having been placed in a care or nursing facility.  And so do I carry a burden which can sometimes be a heavy load.  But at the same time, I value and derive much satisfaction from sharing this time of solace, of humility and quiet contemplation and poignancy with my dear mother.  In what seems and could be her final few weeks or months of life with us.  Well might I be being sentimental, but I am finding this period of playing 'carer' to my dear mother.   To be partly a matter of making amends for or reciprocating the years she had spent caring for m

  These factors have, probably understandably, though rather frustrating and challenging for me, as the person with primary overall responsibility for my dear mother, as I now possess lasting power of attorney for her.  Because, when the system says or demands that those who fall within it brief should be process according to its protocols and procedures, it is not easy for a lowly individual to hold and stand by a contradictory or opposing position.  How can one, when you know only too well, that if your; my opposing position is allowed to carry the day, and things were later to fall apart, as it were.  How well would I be able to defend my position against those who would argue that, 'it was my fault?   That I had gone against the advise of the professionals, and even family members who had argued for the alternative option?  Who had argued that it was clear that my dear mother would not have been able to be safely cared for in her own home, and should have been placed in a care

  Consequent upon her refusing to cooperate with any aspect of her personal care, such as refusing to eat, to drink, to take her medication or to be changed and dressed.  It is a situation which is not helped with her having reached the point where she is no longer able to communicate eloquently, as it were.  With her not being able to consistently comprehend simple questions, such as, Mama, are you hungry?  Mama, what would you like to eat, or drink? Mama, are you feeling cold or hot? Mama, such and such a person sends their regards to you.  Mama, do you want to talk to me about anything? without evoking a puzzling look on my dear mother's face.   Accompanied by her attempt to repeat what I have said to her, but not being able to come near to repeating some or all of it, but only after several attempts, if at all. So, of to the hospital goes my dear mother, having been taken there by the paramedical heroes who have, over the years, become so much a part of my dear mother's lif

      Although, from an ethical and moral, from a rationalist perspective, it would have been better that man learn how to stop presenting and realising the threat they pose to women and their species.  Thereby removing the need to have them performing their 'protector role.'  A role for which they, men, probably should not be given any or as much credit as they might be being given at present. Another 'thing with some men', is that of their vindictive and murderous nature.  That thing about how they can latch onto women like exocet missiles and refuse to allow them the choice, the freedom to leave them, the men.  In this respect, when women leave the men they had been living with, or having relationships with,  Some of these men resort to destroying the lives of these women, and/or, in the worse case scenarios, kill them and/or their children.  The, 'if I cannot have you, then nobody is going to have you', syndrome.  Of course this extreme behaviour is so abnor

  This development has led to a situation where it has become advisable for my dear mother to be admitted to hospital to have a medical assessment.  It is a testimony to my dear mother's sterling pedigree that, she has been found to be still in a medically good condition.  With her gradually increasingly challenging behaviours being a factor of her increasing age and her gradual but relentless neurological and mental deterioration. The impact of which is a call for increased carer support with her personal care of all kinds, and closer monitoring, if not supervision of her daily life.  Which is the challenge confronting members if her family who are continuing to be involved in her welfare.   This development is also bringing back to the fore consideration and discussion about how the increasing frailty and personal care needs of all kinds, of people such as my dear mother, should be met.  Is it time for her to be found a placement in a care home, where she can have a routine of of