CONTEMPLATING THOUGHTS - IT IS TIMES LIKE THESE, WHEN IT IS NOT EASY TO KEEP IT TOGETHER IN HERE!

It is times like these when we fear or are reluctant to make eye contact. 

Fearing that we might see what we are fearful of seeing. 

That we are looking into the eyes of an unhappy soul. That they might see the unhappiness in our own soul. 

That our eyes might betray the sadness which we do not want to communicate, because we are only too aware that they cannot do anything to remove it. 

Not yet, not now. That we must continue to wait, powerlessly, as we risk allowing time to just past by, in our endeavour to 'kill it', quickly. 

So that the time when we can be together and happy again, comes by, more quickly. 

And then we will probably regret the time which has gone by, which we wanted to 'ill'; which we did not, could not live fully, and which has now become lost time.

It is time like these that we fear to look into the eyes of our loved ones, from whom we have been forcefully separated. 

Sometimes for reasons which do not appear to make any sense at all. 

Times when we have been condemned to inhabit and 'pass time' in places and/or conditions in which it is not easy to keep it together.

And so, we and them, must remain in this conspiracy of silence. Of not fully and openly looking into the eyes of each other.  

For fear of intruding into the soul of the other, and seeing the pain which we are both trying to conceal from each other. 

A pain which we both know to be there, because we are both feeling it.  

Though we conceal it, for fear of causing more pain; for both of us. 

Knowing that, if we speak of our pain, and of our fear of their pain, both will become bigger, stronger. 

Causing us to lose the tenuous control which both of us are clinging to, and succumbing becoming overwhelmed with grief. 

With neither of us being able to help the other to assuage the pain and manage the fear we are both trying to suppress.  

To deny to each other, to contain, so that we might all survive the passage of this time of feelings sadness and loss, from being separated, by time, space and/or state of health.

Because, it is times like these, when it is not easy to keep it together in places like these, which we are, at times, fated to live in or inhabit. Be it a state of physical, mental and/or spiritual separation.

Should you ever find yourself having to inhabit such a state, do try to be as strong as you can, and try to live the life which has been fated to you, as best you can. 

Acknowledging that it is different from the one you were living or would have chosen to live, and try to make the necessary mental adjustments. Until and if fate should ever consign you to such a painful and fearful state, do endeavour to live your life as fully, pleasurably and happily as you can.