IT WAS WRITTEN IN THE STARS - AN ACCOUNT OF LIVES IMPACTED BY 'EVERYDAY ADVERSITIES.' PART 10.

It would also be indicative of the stress both children were experiencing, that, the year, 1999, leading upto the January 2000, when their favourite uncle, Mjomba Maalum, died.

Both of them, not surprisingly, were showing marked evidence of the adverse emotional impact of the looming and tragic event.

Mzaliwa was showing signs of low mood, whereas Kazaliwa had, on the same day, 14/10/1999, became very upset and was crying during the night.

When his dad would ask him what was the matter, Kazaliwa would tell him that he “had to deal with it himself,” and could not tell him what was making him sad. 

Following a great deal of gentle persuasion, Kazaliwa would tell his dad that “it is his life”, and about him being of a certain colour. That these are the things which were the cause of his distress.

Kazaliwa would go on to telling his dad that he was also sad because of his behaviour and his school work, and referred to one of his teachers, Mrs Ingram, whom he described as “a ......”

As if that was not enough, Kazaliwa also had to get used to one of his uncles who had a degenerative disease, MS, becoming increasingly ill.

Indeed, when Mfanyazaki consulted his diary for the year 2000, he would find occasions which bore testament to the trauma Kazaliwa was experiencing. 

Even thought his parents might not have drawn the connection, or been aware of the extent of his sadness and how much it was adversely impacting his thinking, attitude and behaviour. 

For example, on 05/04/2000, nearly 4 months after the death of his favourite uncle, Kazaliwa would breakdown in school over the loss. 

Similarly, on 18/04/2000 Kazaliwa and Mzaliwa would ring  Mfanyazaki about the loss of their uncle.  

With Kazaliwa again doing so on the following day, and then thanking his dad for explaining about death to him. 

Notwithstanding such humbling behaviour from his son, by October 2000, Mfanyazaki would be noting in his diary that. Kazaliwa was “testing” him and that he “had been found wanting” and was “finding it immensely trying to control” himself. 

To be continued!