MAKING AN ISSUE OF IT - THE CAR INCIDENT.

 

It is the nature of our human psyche that we can do each other terrible harm by either verbally affronting them/us, and/or physically attacking members of our species. 

Yes, we can also do terrible harm to ourselves by attacking, verbally and/or physically, our loved ones.

Of course, being the oftentimes or normally rational beings that we, or most of us humans are, we do not normally automatically mete out retribution to others who offend or even physically attack us. 

No, where we have some the opportunity to acquire some time to contemplate our response or reaction, we indulge in consideration of the probable reasons why the perpetrator of the offence had done what he/she has done to us or other victims. 

Yes, we consider the probable motive/s; whether they intended the harm we perceive them to have done to us. 

The principles of 'motive' and 'intent' are crucial in jurisprudence. We can see the first as helping us to evaluate and understand whether the wrong we perceived to have been done.  

Is based on the perpetrator's belief that the victim had, in some way which he/she might not even be aware of, harmed them. 

The second principle, 'intent', could be seen as the outcome of the analytical process which leads us to conclude whether or not the impact of the offending behaviour or action. 

Was what the perpetrator intended it to have been, or should reasonably have expected or anticipated it to have been.

So, in light of the above, how might I have been expected to feel when a man, driving an old, battered and very noisy white van. 

Arrived at my home, pointed at my car of a certain age, pointed at my car, and asked: "Is your old car for sale, mate.?"

No, there was no 'for sale' sign on the car, which was parked on my forecourt, while I was busy conversing on the phone with someone. 

No, I said to him, whereupon he acknowledged my response and, without any ado, retreated from my home, as I continued with my telephone conversation. 

But no sooner than that came to an end, did I find myself in a state of bewilderment, deflation and psychological hurt.

I mean, the car is old but it is working fine. What could have given rise to this man's uncalled for behaviour? 

 Is this his normal modus operandi, or did he just on the spur of the moment decided to ask that question? Was it his intention to cause me psychological and emotional harm by his unexpected question?

That I do not know, but I do know that it did negatively impacted me. Rather brutally so, as I had not expected him to behave as he did. And had therefore not prepared myself for my vanity to be so pointedly challenged. 

Still, I am good now; the felt and perceived negative interpretation of the incident has now been resolved, and I am now fine.