JUST PHILOSOPHING ON : SOME OF WHAT I HAVE LEARNT FROM LIFE! PART 9.

 

I have learntl that any 'normal' and/or empathetic person who have experienced breaking up - regardless of who initiated the ending - who is confronted with ending an intimate relationship. 

One in which they had invested a significant degree of their sense of being, their identities, will be confronted with powerful and potentially destructive emotions. 

I have learnt that these emotions are likely to be common to most, if not all persons who have experienced the break-up of a strong intimate relationship, whether it be a marital or non-marital one.

I have learnt that these strong emotions are likely to include all or some of the following. 

Shock; anger, rage, denial, feelings of being hurt, unbelievability, self-destructive feelings, wanting to hurt the other person and/or others close to them, despair, self-pity.

I have learnt that, although some of the negative and destructive feelings are or might be common to all or most people' experiencing the trauma associated with the dramatic ending of an intimate relationship. 

What can prevent or mitigate disastrous outcomes are the availability of appropriate support and services available, and accessible to the relevant parties, and their psychological and personal receptiveness to working with those services and support. 

People, including me, might think that we/they are experiencing a unique trauma when a partner 'walks out of the door' or 'insists that you leave the family's home' or 'tells you that the relationship/marriage is dead.' 

However, this kind of event is always happening to people. The only 'uniqueness' about it, is how the involved party/ies 'experience it', and how they process and deal with it. 

With some doing so peacefully and with magnanimity, while a minority, tragically, resorting to unhealthy and destructive means which increased the pain and tragic consequences for them and/or former partners and families and friends. 

To be continued!